Normally, I sit down on Friday nights or Saturday mornings and write my blog. It gives me time to write, walk away, marinate and then go back to it before posting it late afternoon or evening on Saturday. Sometimes though, I’m a little mentally constipated, and it doesn’t get posted until Sunday. This week though, I didn’t want to follow my usual process because of my negative topic. I had a book signing today at Indigo Burlington, and didn’t want any negativity hovering over my aura before going there, so I thought I’d write tonight. As I am now.
Let me backtrack a bit to how my day started: Got up at four and let the dogs out to do their “business,” and then decided not to exercise or walk the dogs, and went back to bed to get a couple more hours of sleep. When I got up at seven, I found my granddaughter’s tunic top from the night before outside my bedroom door. “Oh gawd no!” Oh gawd, “yes” actually. My damn, sucky-baby dog took exception to me going back to bed and found something to suck on to comfort his dejected soul. And by “suck on,” I mean “suck on it until all the flavor is gone and then eat it.” Yes, he ate half of my granddaughter’s dress.
“Please God, don’t let this be something I can’t replace.”
I felt sick to my stomach that I had been so irresponsible to allow it to happen. Thankfully, he didn’t eat the tag, so I saw that it was from Baby Gap. I quickly went online and found that it was current stock. Phew!
“Please God, let me find this in stock locally so that I don’t have to order it online and pay the shipping fee.” (Sorry… can’t shake my tight-wad genetics.)
My prayers were answered—and even more so—it was a 40% off sale today and tomorrow. The Jewish-Scottish girl in me squealed with delight. Now I needed to alter my timing for the day, so that I could go and pick it up on the way to my book signing.
That’s how my day started.
I spent a few hours at the book signing, met some great people, sold a few books, packed up, picked up my granddaughter from “other grandma,” dropped her off at my daughter’s house (long story), and went home to kiss my beloved and write my “negative” blog. Well, hubby was waiting with a refreshing bevie for me, so we took our lounge chairs and sat in the sun for a bit.
I was surprised how quickly I became emotional during our conversation, and just attributed it to fatigue and attempting to be everything to everyone. Then it hit me. It wasn’t my fatigue. It was something from today. It was her. If you’re reading this… it was you.
- You are once divorced and now-engaged
- You are a blended family of five kids
- You were wearing blue nail polish
- You bought my book and the manager overheard you tell your daughter how excited you were that the author was going to sign it
- Your daughter asked for an extra chocolate “Veronica Pop” for her other sister who was there with you
- You asked me to dedicate the book to your five blended children instead of you (which is why I don’t know your name)
Are you reading this? Have I found you? Or is this just another episode of Missed Connections with Scott Fox and Kat Callaghan that my husband and I listen to on 103.5 FM during our morning commute? I hope I won’t sound as “stalkeresque” as what we hear on their morning show.
Let me tell you something about you: You found a place in my heart.
As I admired your blue nail polish with envy, I thought, “I wish I had the courage to wear colours like that.” The bold fashion statement was definitely overshadowed by the light in your eyes. You had an energy surrounding you that warmed my heart, and when you told me that you had beat cancer twice, I congratulated you… only to be told that you are starting the next one soon.
What? Wasn’t I listening properly? Didn’t she just say that she beat cancer twice?
It was then, I noticed a scar on your neck. And then another. And another. I’m assuming they were battle scars from your fights. One of the two fights where you took down the enemy… or so you thought. I hope my comment doesn’t make you feel self-conscious though. I didn’t even notice until you drew my attention to them. Then again… maybe you wear them with pride.
You told me that it was “okay.” I think I recall you even saying that it was “no big deal.”
“No big deal?”
A beautiful woman with brilliant eyes, stood in front of me and told me that her upcoming battle with cancer was “no big deal.” You told me that my book would be your “chemo read.” I struggled to fight back my tears and restrained myself from the urge to wrap my arms around you.
I told you to “kick the shit” out of your latest path in life, and you promised me that you would.
As you left, I said, “Make sure you go to my site and send me a message and let me know how you’re doing. I’d really like to hear from you.”
You stopped dead in your tracks and looked at me momentarily with disbelief. Were your thoughts something like, “Why would she want to hear from me?”
Why wouldn’t I want to hear from you?
Why wouldn’t I want to be your cheerleader?
You have humbled me.
- My dog ate my granddaughter’s dress
- My hair didn’t turn out how I wanted it to
- My sales weren’t what I’d hoped they would be
Those were my selfish concerns today.
Thank you, my nameless angel.
Thank you for reminding me to be stronger and more grateful for what a blessed life I have.
Thank you for being an inspiration.