Do You “Love” Him? Or are you “IN Love” With Him?


As featured at Digital Romance

I love bacon.

I love kittens.

I love the smell of fresh cut grass.

I love it when my husband kisses the nape of my neck when my hair is upswept.

I love my husband.

Wait.

Do I love my husband, or am I in love with my husband?

I don’t think many people realize the vast difference between the two expressions of what might seem like the same emotion. Quite honestly though, I think if you just re-read what I wrote above, my point would become abundantly clear and I could wrap this blog up right now and go and cuddle with the man whom I claim to love so much.

One hundred twelve words. It could have been my shortest blog ever. Maybe it would have even qualified for the Guinness World Book of Records as the shortest blog ever. Well, I don’t think I’m going to let either you or me off the hook that easily this time. C’mon. Let’s go for a walk down Lover’s Lane together.

When you answer your phone, you say “Hello.” Why?

When you are about to end your call, you say something like, “Bye,” or “Talk to you later,” or “I love you.”

“I love you” becomes just a knee-jerk response to ending a call with your loved one. Does it mean anything? Does it honestly even mean anything if you don’t pause and say, “Sweetheart, before you hang up, I just want to tell you that I love you”?

That has feeling. That has emotion. Not, “Okay, bye, love you.” That’s just cack.

I am in love with my husband and I remind both myself, and him, of that as often as I can. Just tonight, for example, on our commute home together, I turned to him and said, “Sweetheart, I’m in love with you.”

“It’s my phone.”

“What? I said that I’m in love with you.”

“I said it’s just my phone.”

I stared at him in disbelief and shouted, “I said, ‘I’m in love with you’!”

“Ohhhh… I thought you asked, ‘Is that you?’ because my phone’s alarm was going off.”

<Blink, blink>

Sigh. Attempt at expressing my undying devotion #4,987: FAIL

Despite his misunderstanding tonight, he knows I would crawl for miles on broken glass, in the Sahara desert, uphill, in the snow, both ways, to get my hands on a crispy piece of bacon marbled with just the right meat-to-fat ratio. But does he know I’d give up bacon, or even my life, for him?

I actually shuddered at that statement just now. Life without bacon, or bacon without my life. Geez. Do I really love this guy, that much? Maybe I should beg for a compromise and explain that I love him just as much as bacon (but maybe not as much as bacon dipped in pure maple syrup).

Damn you bacon! Get out of my head. I do love him more than you!

After 491 words, there was a point to all of this. The point being that we make “I love you” or the term “love” too much of a part of our day-to-day. We have lost sight of the reason the word was invented:

“To express a profound emotion of adoration to someone who holds the key to your heart.”

No, you won’t find that on Wikipedia or in the Merriam-Webster dictionary—that’s a Veronica statement.

My challenge to you is to re-sensitize the word “love” again. Don’t let it continue to be just another word. Stop and look your partner in the eyes and say, “I’m in love with you.” Hold that gaze, put the rest of the world on pause for just a nanosecond, and let your message imbed itself deep into their heart.

 

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